helping families thrive. . .
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Be it resolved that the truth of kids doing chores is ‘mom/dad needs a break.’
Opposed: How do you know that’s true?
Affirmative: I/we work hard
Opposed: Good. Hard work is good for people, especially their mental health.
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Be it resolved that the truth of kids doing chores is ‘they need to learn how.’
... argue that point in the affirmative, and see where it gets you...
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Question 1. How can I improve my kids’ attitudes toward helping out at home? Short answer: good luck with that.
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Parent says 1. I really need kids to pitch in (write in reason of choice: single parent, busy schedule, ailing parents, demanding job, kids waste time, they have to, it’s their turn…) What parents need isn't for kids to handle. Adults help kids with their needs, not the other way around.
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Parent Question 1.
How can I make my child listen?
Parent Coach Answer 1.
You mean 'obey.'
No, no, no, no ... yes, you do. What are the other options? Coming soon in the series on Chores and Children.
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Fear is the absolute worst place to make decisions as a parent: it pushes kids away, creates rebellion, gives us our very own heart attacks, and doesn't keep our kids safe, anyhow. 'But the world is dangerous,' they say, and, 'people are dangerous, and kids think they're bulletproof...' as if that's a reason to make choices out of fear. It may feel like a compelling argument, but it's not a good reason. There is an antidote to this: THE PRESENT MOMENT, from The Way & the Power of Mothering
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There Will Always Be Rebels
6-Mar-2021
Browsing through an old portable hard drive, I have discovered some old writing... including some of my terrible, hilarious, weird poetry. This one goes, I think, with the post about how the curmudgeons always claim these kids are the 'worst ever'... check that one out here. Apologies are probably in order, but here goes: There Will Always Be Rebels In the stillness of morning air 3 small branches dancing there The apple tree is old and staid But in its small twigs, breezes played. 'Settle down…
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Parenting Is Not a Sacrifice
11-Jan-2021
It isn't sacrifice.
It is hard work, and often thankless work (and, no, having people gush in awe about the noble sacrifice is not at all like feeling appreciated, or paid, for it). It is often work that will push a person over the far edge of what they thought they could do with limited energy and total exhaustion...
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Pros & Cons of Attachment-Style Parenting
11-Jan-2021
A more realistic view of the real Pros and Cons of Attachment-Style Parenting:
Cons: 1. Huge time suck: Think 'most of 20 years.' When I was asked why spend so much time engaged this closely with my children, my simple answer was 'I like them, and I like spending time with them,' as true in their infancy as it was in their toddlerhood, teens and twenties. I wanted to care for them as much as I cared about them.Pros: 1. Independent, adventurous, self-confident...~ 3. Strong trust, a benefit to me
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As described in the companion post, there are a lot of feels happening in the lead-in to the holidays this year. Check that post out for how to deal with those feelings, before getting tucked into what to do about this year... With the world struggling to flatten the curve of the second wave of the pandemic, just as it threatens to become a tsunami, a lot of people are wondering 'what is going to happen to Christmas?' What indeed? As I wrote earlier, about alternative festive Halloween options, …